I started writing a post about portraits and then I got distracted by what is rapidly becoming the biggest hype of this summer… because last week we went and saw Barbie.
I grew up in the Caribbean, a strong resourceful mother, studied nursing in Cambridge England worked a couple years in my home island then emigrated to Canada where I now live and have been for over 60 years. I am now 88. I was in the vanguard of the feminist movement Woman’s lib in those days. I fought for women’s rights, for free abortion on demand and will continue fighting for the rest of my life. We still live to this day in a patriarchal society, the world is still basically run by men, when women get into powerful positions and make mistakes as all leaders do, they are crucified unmercifully, unlike men and are held up by by men as to why women should not ever hold power, they should go back to the kitchen.In every society, there is male privilege and no matter that there are many males who are not sexist. they still consciously or unconsciously enjoy male privilege. My husband is British absolutely considers himself to be non sexist but it is there.I have always wondered why British women were so non liberated and still so subservient to their husbands, why they were still so into the role of being a woman and what women did in the house, no real division of labour, women still do the cooking and are responsible for the housework even if the couple both have jobs. Oh my husband helps a lot they say and seem to be satisfied with that state of affairs. I just roll my eyes.Hopefully the new generation will slowly create a world where there is true equality between the sexes.Not in my lifetime but I will be observing from the other side of the veil. It would be interesting to see if AI will sexist.
Thank you - I really enjoyed reading your views Marilyn and yes totally agree with what you say. It's interesting that you can see this innate sexism in the British - I guess it's harder to see when you are here but I do have hope that things will change. My ex husband was definitely not a great example for my children but my two eldest sons who are both married with children make me very proud. They both do equal share of the child care, housework and my eldest does nearly all the cooking. There are no male or female jobs in their homes but just shared things that need doing, which is how it is for me and my husband now. He does stuff I find boring and I do stuff he finds boring. But I stand by my view that Barbie really was not an important feminist movie!
thank you Gina. Your sons sound lovely, my son too is like that and my daughters have wonderful partners. You are extremely lucky to have the husband you do and he is extremely lucky to have you. Such marriages as far as I can see are not the norm yet. I enjoy your posts and podcasts tremendously. I do love your work . I have been a fan from way way, way back. Thank you for enhancing my quilting life.
Marilyn, Thank you that really has made my day. I do sometimes wonder when I do all the stuff I do whether it is worthwhile, other than for my own enjoyment, and then someone says something lovely like you and I know exactly why I do what I do. I think if we can live a life connecting with people and inspiring then that can only be a good thing. I have had a recent resurgence of interest in quilting so there will be some writing on that in the near future!
Like you, I've never been one for the women in charge good, men in charge bad - bolstered by the fact that I have had terrible women bosses in my time, and one was a leading academic promoting many feminist theories. Her female staff and male colleagues all had a rough time.
I had an older brother and sister, but my father, born 1912, was ahead of his time and we were never stereotyped . He would happily have trained me as a plumber if I'd wished or let my brother take on any career he fancied. We all played with dolls and toy guns.
Thank you. He was a great example. Happily cooked - very good at roasts and xmas dinner, cleaned if necessary, and supported my mother on every occasion.
We definitely need more men like that! I'm proud that my sons all cook, clean, do childcare and there never seems to be an issue with the division of labour. Although my husband never cooks (and really can't) I don't mind because I love to do it when he obviously doesn't but then he vacuums and irons which I never do. I think at the end of the day it's about playing to our own strengths and having respect for each other.
Interesting take on it! I went to see it twice: with my daughter, then again with my husband - not the only male in the audience but close. Our ‘interpretation’ of its message is a little different to yours: we didn’t feel it was pushing a “women in charge is best” agenda, but redressed the balance between an all-male or all-female perspective. It offered a better description of what feminism should be - not a “women are best” or “women centric” approach being better, but rather a more balanced view where women can be lifted without men being denigrated. Men need to be able to feel that even without the patriarchy they can still have ambition, succeed, and feel confident and proud of their achievements - not be left entirely devoid of respect, lose their place in the world, their identity. This was Ken’s journey! Too often feminism is portrayed by men - and some women - as seeking to make men as downtrodden and powerless as women have been/are still, which is probably why a lot of men say they hate feminism/feminists. We need equality, not a patriarchy or a matriarchy.
The other significant thing I took from it was the bit where she felt “self conscious” and didn’t recognise it - it was an alien feeling in Barbieworld. We are naturally confident and expressive- look at any 2 yr old - but we learn not to be. That has given me huge food for thought!
That's an interesting view too but your arguments are not convincing me. I guess the fact that we all have different views and interpretations is what makes life and people interesting.
Of course I agree with the idea that women should be valued without belittling or denigrating men and vice versa but didn't hear that anywhere in this film. Maybe I nodded off at that bit! I believe there are far more erudite messages about feminism from other sources out there. (Including the one I cited) For me, this will remain a fun and very entertaining film despite trying to be something it wasn't!
So bizarre - that we notice such different things!! Ken’s whole story throughout the film was about this (what I said 👆) - but ultimately I don’t think this was a film about feminism per se, but about the need for equality, and to believe in yourself as an individual - male or female.
I love that different people can read a book or see a film and take something completely different from it and I agree that it's more about being yourself and believing in yourself. I think the point I was making (hence the title of my post) arose from the many reviews and blogpost etc (and I read a load!) making wild claims about it being such an important film with a powerful feminist message. It left me feeling that too many people take themselves too seriously and were making these claims to make themselves feel intelligent rather than admit they just enjoyed it... a bit Emperor's new clothes! I'm back to art this week!
I hope you're enjoying your holiday and the sun is still shining. Back to rain here today but only a couple of weeks until we go away!
I grew up in the Caribbean, a strong resourceful mother, studied nursing in Cambridge England worked a couple years in my home island then emigrated to Canada where I now live and have been for over 60 years. I am now 88. I was in the vanguard of the feminist movement Woman’s lib in those days. I fought for women’s rights, for free abortion on demand and will continue fighting for the rest of my life. We still live to this day in a patriarchal society, the world is still basically run by men, when women get into powerful positions and make mistakes as all leaders do, they are crucified unmercifully, unlike men and are held up by by men as to why women should not ever hold power, they should go back to the kitchen.In every society, there is male privilege and no matter that there are many males who are not sexist. they still consciously or unconsciously enjoy male privilege. My husband is British absolutely considers himself to be non sexist but it is there.I have always wondered why British women were so non liberated and still so subservient to their husbands, why they were still so into the role of being a woman and what women did in the house, no real division of labour, women still do the cooking and are responsible for the housework even if the couple both have jobs. Oh my husband helps a lot they say and seem to be satisfied with that state of affairs. I just roll my eyes.Hopefully the new generation will slowly create a world where there is true equality between the sexes.Not in my lifetime but I will be observing from the other side of the veil. It would be interesting to see if AI will sexist.
Thank you - I really enjoyed reading your views Marilyn and yes totally agree with what you say. It's interesting that you can see this innate sexism in the British - I guess it's harder to see when you are here but I do have hope that things will change. My ex husband was definitely not a great example for my children but my two eldest sons who are both married with children make me very proud. They both do equal share of the child care, housework and my eldest does nearly all the cooking. There are no male or female jobs in their homes but just shared things that need doing, which is how it is for me and my husband now. He does stuff I find boring and I do stuff he finds boring. But I stand by my view that Barbie really was not an important feminist movie!
thank you Gina. Your sons sound lovely, my son too is like that and my daughters have wonderful partners. You are extremely lucky to have the husband you do and he is extremely lucky to have you. Such marriages as far as I can see are not the norm yet. I enjoy your posts and podcasts tremendously. I do love your work . I have been a fan from way way, way back. Thank you for enhancing my quilting life.
Marilyn, Thank you that really has made my day. I do sometimes wonder when I do all the stuff I do whether it is worthwhile, other than for my own enjoyment, and then someone says something lovely like you and I know exactly why I do what I do. I think if we can live a life connecting with people and inspiring then that can only be a good thing. I have had a recent resurgence of interest in quilting so there will be some writing on that in the near future!
Like you, I've never been one for the women in charge good, men in charge bad - bolstered by the fact that I have had terrible women bosses in my time, and one was a leading academic promoting many feminist theories. Her female staff and male colleagues all had a rough time.
I had an older brother and sister, but my father, born 1912, was ahead of his time and we were never stereotyped . He would happily have trained me as a plumber if I'd wished or let my brother take on any career he fancied. We all played with dolls and toy guns.
I like the sound of your Dad Jane!
Thank you. He was a great example. Happily cooked - very good at roasts and xmas dinner, cleaned if necessary, and supported my mother on every occasion.
We definitely need more men like that! I'm proud that my sons all cook, clean, do childcare and there never seems to be an issue with the division of labour. Although my husband never cooks (and really can't) I don't mind because I love to do it when he obviously doesn't but then he vacuums and irons which I never do. I think at the end of the day it's about playing to our own strengths and having respect for each other.
Interesting take on it! I went to see it twice: with my daughter, then again with my husband - not the only male in the audience but close. Our ‘interpretation’ of its message is a little different to yours: we didn’t feel it was pushing a “women in charge is best” agenda, but redressed the balance between an all-male or all-female perspective. It offered a better description of what feminism should be - not a “women are best” or “women centric” approach being better, but rather a more balanced view where women can be lifted without men being denigrated. Men need to be able to feel that even without the patriarchy they can still have ambition, succeed, and feel confident and proud of their achievements - not be left entirely devoid of respect, lose their place in the world, their identity. This was Ken’s journey! Too often feminism is portrayed by men - and some women - as seeking to make men as downtrodden and powerless as women have been/are still, which is probably why a lot of men say they hate feminism/feminists. We need equality, not a patriarchy or a matriarchy.
The other significant thing I took from it was the bit where she felt “self conscious” and didn’t recognise it - it was an alien feeling in Barbieworld. We are naturally confident and expressive- look at any 2 yr old - but we learn not to be. That has given me huge food for thought!
That's an interesting view too but your arguments are not convincing me. I guess the fact that we all have different views and interpretations is what makes life and people interesting.
Of course I agree with the idea that women should be valued without belittling or denigrating men and vice versa but didn't hear that anywhere in this film. Maybe I nodded off at that bit! I believe there are far more erudite messages about feminism from other sources out there. (Including the one I cited) For me, this will remain a fun and very entertaining film despite trying to be something it wasn't!
So bizarre - that we notice such different things!! Ken’s whole story throughout the film was about this (what I said 👆) - but ultimately I don’t think this was a film about feminism per se, but about the need for equality, and to believe in yourself as an individual - male or female.
I love that different people can read a book or see a film and take something completely different from it and I agree that it's more about being yourself and believing in yourself. I think the point I was making (hence the title of my post) arose from the many reviews and blogpost etc (and I read a load!) making wild claims about it being such an important film with a powerful feminist message. It left me feeling that too many people take themselves too seriously and were making these claims to make themselves feel intelligent rather than admit they just enjoyed it... a bit Emperor's new clothes! I'm back to art this week!
I hope you're enjoying your holiday and the sun is still shining. Back to rain here today but only a couple of weeks until we go away!