13 Comments

Just catching up with everything Gina - so sad to read this and I am sending you much love - it is hard when it is our Mothers - and doubly hard with the appalling lack of support that we get from the "professionals"

Good to read that you can still laugh with your Mum, and the picture at the end is such a delight.

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Oct 1Liked by Gina Ferrari

I feel your pain. Ive been through it twice so far - with my ma-in-law and then my Dad, and now its starting with my Mum. Little things, but I see the signs. I know this sounds trite, and almost impossible to achieve, but deep breaths (in the face of bureaucracy) and 15 minutes making art a day really helped me... Oh, and some good loud music!

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Oct 1Liked by Gina Ferrari

I always enjoy your missives, Gina, whatever the subject.

Like Thelma, I can recommend the book Contented Dementia. It really helped us understand the many facets of this cruel and frustrating condition when trying to help our elderly aunt and we have employed many of the suggestions that help remove potential conflict. Knowing you, I’m sure you’re doing all the right things despite the opinion of the ‘professionals’ 😘

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Oct 1Liked by Gina Ferrari

Thanks for sharing your story. I haven't been in exactly your situation. But I can certainly relate to your experience with your Mum. You want to feel supported and have some help but real understanding of the problems you face is just not there. I think of you as someone who thinks outside the box, so I'm sure you will do that and find your own unique kind of solution. I know you are a great reader. I always recommend an amazing book to anyone looking after an older person. It is Contented Dementia by psychologist Oliver James. It's basically a different way of thinking about dementia, and has some very simple and practical ideas. It might help.

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Flexibility is a necessity and a super power. I agree with you that Substack is a much more relaxed way of sharing stuff. Love your painting in this post. Wishing you a better week ahead.

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Oct 1Liked by Gina Ferrari

I am really loving reading your thoughts. So much so that this morning when your name didn't appear on my emails, I was disappointed. I have just finished listening to Still Life, thanks to your enthusiasm for the book. And grandchildren really do bring a light to our lives, whatever else is going on.

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